{ Motherless Daughters } uniting those experiencing motherloss

Our Stories

Elizabeth's Story

I graduated from college in May of 2003 and took some time off to have some fun and hoping that some idea of a career path would strike my interest along the way. I worked for an outdoor company in North Carolina every summer in college and I decided to head there again after graduation. Convienently, my family has a house up there and I was able to stay. After the season I then headed out West to work in a ski town, which was the best time of my life thus far. There I realized I wanted to go to nursing school! I moved back to North Carolina to work one last summer.

I decided to move home to the deep South with my parents that winter to begin prerequisites for nursing school. I want a BSN in nursing and that requires about 6-8 prereq classes and since i have a degree in History I had alot of courses to take. My mother was very happy that I had decided what i wanted to do and so was I. The moving back home part was an adjustment just because i was use to living on my own since high school. My parents always supported me financially and emotionally, but I still had the independence of living my own life far off from where I grew up. I took the "moving back home" experience and looked at it as having good quality time with my parents. None of my friends lived in my hometown anymore, so I pretty much studied and hung out with my parents. My mother and I would go on long walks every afternoon. We both loved to walk for exercise. It is strange but sometime back in February when we were walking around the neighborhood I turned to her and said "why do you nag me so much?" She said, "Elizabeth, I just want you to know how to act in every situation, so you will know what to do one day when i am not here." Whether that was table manners, how to keep the house organized and clean, or sewing a button.

I wish i had not studied so much and spent more time with her. I would get iriatated when she would tell me to unload the dishwasher or to get my bag off the table. If i knew then what I know now, I would have never gotten iritated. I wish so badly that she was here to even "nag" me.

I have 2 older brothers both whom are married and the oldest has a 22 month old boy. And ever since that little boy was born my mother was bending over backwards to help my brother and get down to see my little nephew any chance she got. He was her world, she was so in love. We went and visited with him the weekend before my parents left on their trip because she had not seen him in 2 weeks ; and then they were going on that trip to England for almost 2 weeks and that just added up to be to long for her to go without seeing her grandbaby. My nephew was about 17 months then and he just learned how to give kisses and that is the last thing he did for my mother and I know it made her so happy! She always hated leaving him. I told my mother that i saw a bumper sticker that said, "If we knew grandchildren would be this fun we would have had them first." She loved that!

My dad had planned a trip to England for he and my mother. She was so excited. They traveled out of the country about once a year to go to Europe. They loved to travel. I took then to the airport that afternoon. Something told me to do something nice for her so I helped her get her luggage out and over the curb. All of a sudden i was overwhelmed with lonliness with the thought of them leaving me because i had no friends really at home. Earlier i thought this will be good alone time. Well that thought changed. I hugged my mom hard and told her I loved her and then my dad. Then something in my head said, "Look at them like it is the last time," as I walked to the driver's seat. And I turned back and took a good look at the back of their heads as they checked in outside. I started to cry and then say to my self "that is ridiculous." I drove home. I remember every detail almost about that day.

I went home and studied hard. My best friend was in town for the weekend so I hung out with her and her mother all weekend. Her mother and my mother were best friends. I love being with them. So i was not to lonesome. I would go home at night and study.

Monday morning at about 7:20 I heard my door to my bedroom creek open. It is a noise i can hardly bare to stand anymore. I was still sleeping and had no contacts in but when i heard that creek I thought "who is that I am the only home since mom and dad are in England." Then I saw my brother(younger of the 2) and his wife enter and my heart sank. I'll always remember his face and his tears and him saying 'i don't want to have to tell you this". He said our mother and father were in an accident and that our mother didn't make it. Oh.... this couldn't be real! I said, "no this isn't real." They assured me it was. I thought i mgith have still been asleep. I still don't believe it somedays. I asked how my dad was and my brother said that they didn't know if he was going to survive either. I felt like an ORPHAN. I went from feeling like the most loved individual in the world to feeling completely alone. I was shocked. I started having all these superficial thoughts right away, which i feel sick about now. I guess i just wasn't thinking straight. I just thought this could not have possibly happened. My mother was so aware that things like accidents could happen and always warned me to be so careful.

That day was sort of a blur. My best friend and mother came over and close friends of the family and a Priest. My brother and I went to the church that morning to pray for our parents and because we knew my father was going into surgery and we were unsure what the outcome would be. He made it through that surgery. Thank the Lord, he figured that he had internal bleeding and said that they better do something quick. They do not take all the precautions and tests that we take here in the US.

The week was crazy and both of my brothers went to England to be with my dad and my sister n laws stayed with me. I really wish I had gone. Just to see what it was like where they were.

My parents had gone out to eat Sunday night in England after a day of touring and going to Dover castle. They had gone to eat at this fabulous place. My dad said they had a wonderful time and that they were playing wonderful 60's music like "my girl", which was my mother's favorite. On the way back to their Bed and Breakfast they were in a head on collision.

My world came to a hault!

This is so hard for me. And since the accident happened overseas it made it even more difficult. My dad has made a full recovery. He goes to work and exercises. He may have to have one more surgery but he is doing great. I want to be more appreciative that i have him but i am so upset about my mother that it is hard to see the positive side.

Thanks for letting me share my story. I miss her so much! I feel comfort knowing that other people go through hard times!

Š Elizabeth

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